I cannot believe this. Here I am, once again, procrastinating. Am I ever gonna learn from my mistakes? Evidently not.
What the hell. Since I'm already here, might as well.
This semester started off pretty chill. And by chill, I mean disastrous. Aside from the fact that I had a mental breakdown during the first two weeks of the semester, I'd tried something completely new. Which turned out to be something which I can now cross off my bucket list. It wasn't the idea itself that made it so memorable, it was more to what I gained after it was over.
Meeting new people has never been one of my strong suits, let alone being good friends with them. But in this case, I found myself surrounded with new faces, friendly personalities, and weird people, to say the least. Somewhere along the lines, I realized that I could be myself around them, just as I am with my family and close friends. This was a rare find, especially in my university. Which is why I'm striving hard to keep in close contact with them.
Unfortunately, it's not going so well. In my efforts to have a stronger bond with them, I have been neglecting everything else in life. My studies, my family, my religion. I did not want to forsake them, but that was what I was doing. Even now, I am struggling to complete a video assignment due by today. And it's a group project. My God, I'm the worst. Just the other day I did not contribute to a group assignment. I still feel bad about that, as I should.
And to top it all off, I have this dilemma (Yeah, big shocker.)
There's this guy, and I think he likes me. I know, I KNOW. Why would anyone fall for ME? I'm probably about as interesting as the moss that grows in damp places. I really don't get it. But perhaps it could be due to the fact that we have a lot in common. I do like him, but I feel that we have a platonic relationship. I don't know if I feel the same way he does. I don't want to hurt him by telling him we can't work out, at least not now. My feelings are ever-changing towards people. For now, I want to remain friends. It would not be fair to him, or me, if I were to lead him on and I end up hurting us both. I wonder what will happen...
